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Lately, I have been thinking about the danger of attachments. We all make attachments to things and people, it’s what being human is all about. We seldom question our attachments even when we know, or at least suspect, they might be unhealthy, harmful even dangerous. We derive our sense of identity from our attachments. In conversation, we ask  “what do you do?” “where do you live” and “what church do you go to?”. We ask these questions because they give us a sense of who we are they create our sense of identity. 

Those of us who drive cars don’t see the car as being “us” we only drive it, it’s not who we are, yet we do this in so many other areas of our lives. What we do for a living, where we live, the people we mix with, the church we attend, the clothes we wear, where we were born, etc, go into creating our identity. In his book, ” The Journey Home” Simon Parke says; “The parent sits down to watch the school play their child is performing and they have made the costume themselves. They sit in the audience and watch. They are restless for the appearance of their child. They are some way into the performance and still no sign. They begin to get irritated by other performers hogging the stage. They want their own child to shine.

They are restless now, not noticing very much at all. Certainly they do not notice the child in tears, who missed his cue and came in late. They have eyes only for their child, in the costume they made!

The virtuous parent identifies with their child. What could be more natural? But such attachment is unwise. Attachments make us blind. Identifying colours our perceptions. We become blind people who notice nothing and enjoy nothing. We become the plaything of our ego.

Attachment is unhelpful, unhealthy and often dangerous, as Parke points out it makes us blind to everything else. Where do we begin? and how do we begin? it seems we have a un-natural propensity towards attachments of all kinds even God. The greatest thing we can do for ourselves is not add this to our, already, long list of things that must be done. We can begin to observe ourselves but not in judgment or anger or frustration but with gentleness and compassion. What is not observed cannot be seen, what is not seen cannot be brought into the light. When we bring these things, gently, into the light they slowly lose their power.

The ego finds its strength through the lack of any observation it can only survive and thrive through ignorance and blindness to the same extent that we are ignorant of our ego’s to this same level is its dominance. Little wonder that Jesus said Father, forgive them for they know not what they do. He was speaking the truth they had NO idea, they were blind to their own attachments.

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